<- 2017 - in the world **Eva Hoffmann** is the author of *Lost in Translation, Exit into History* and *Shtetl*, and was the recipient of a Guggenheim Fellowship in 1998. She lives in London. Also by Eva Hoffman Lost in Translation Exit into History Copyright © 1998 by Eva Hoffman All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. Published in the United States by PublicAffairs™, a member of the Perseus Books Group. No part of this book may be reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews. For information, address PublicAffairs, 250 West 57th Street, Suite 1321, New York, NY 10107. Book design by Jenny Dossin. Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Hoffman, Eva, 1945- The secret : a fable for our times / Eva Hoffman. — 1st ed. p. cm. ISBN 1-891620-06-2 (hc) 1. Man-woman relationships—United States—Fiction. 2. Psychotherapist and patient—Fiction. I. Title. PS3558.03465543 1998 813'.54—dc21 98-26445 CIP FIRST EDITION 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 # 1 he story begins, like many other stories, with a man and a woman. They are an attractive couple, and to look at them in the street or at ## T a party, you would think that they are happy. They are not unhappy, exactly, but they have been married for several years now, and the first flush of excitement has faded. Their love has grown comfortable and companionable. They are used to each other, and sometimes they are bored. Now Iris, the woman, is thirty-two, and she has begun to feel a certain impatience, a certain yearning. She feels that her life is too placid, too predictable; she wants something new, something to happen to her. She isn’t quite sure what she wants, but perhaps it is something like a second chance, or a second life. She has a vague sense that somewhere, out there, there is a door that will open onto an entirely different world, a world of richness, of intensity, of significance. If only she could find that door. If only she could turn the magic key. One day, she is walking down the street, and she sees a sign above a doorway. The sign says, simply, The Secret. She stops, and looks at it, and is intrigued. She has always liked secrets. They are private and intimate: they create a special bond between the person who tells and the person who is told. She has always thought that a secret is a kind of gift, a gift of trust. So she walks up the steps and opens the door. Inside, she finds a small, dimly lit room. There are a few chairs and a desk, and behind the desk sits a man. He is middle-aged, with a kind face and gentle eyes. He looks at her and smiles. “Can I help you?” he asks. “I’m not sure,” Iris says. “I saw your sign. What is The Secret?” The man leans forward. “The Secret,” he says, “is that there is no secret. But if you want to know more, you will have to come back. You will have to come back every day for a week. And each day, I will tell you a little more.” Iris is intrigued. She agrees to come back. The next day, she returns. The man is waiting for her. He asks her to sit down, and he begins to talk. He talks about the nature of reality, about the illusions we live by, about the masks we wear. He talks about the need for authenticity, for honesty, for truth. He talks about the importance of facing up to who we really are. Iris listens, fascinated. She has never heard anyone talk like this before. She feels as if she is being given a glimpse into a hidden world, a world of deeper meanings and greater possibilities. She feels as if she is being awakened from a long sleep. On the third day, the man talks about love. He says that most people do not know how to love. They confuse love with possession, with need, with dependency. They use love as a way of avoiding themselves. But real love, he says, is a meeting of two souls. It is a recognition of the other person’s essential being. It is a gift of freedom. Iris thinks about her own marriage. She loves her husband, but she has to admit that their love has become routine. They have settled into a pattern, and they no longer really see each other. They take each other for granted. She wonders if there is a way to recover the intensity they once had. On the fourth day, the man talks about death. He says that most people are afraid of death, and so they avoid thinking about it. But death is a part of life, he says. It is the great mystery. And if we can face up to death, if we can accept it, then we can live more fully. We can appreciate the preciousness of each moment. Iris thinks about her own mortality. She is still young, but she knows that she will not live forever. She wonders what she wants to do with her life. She wonders what legacy she will leave behind. On the fifth day, the man talks about God. He says that God is not a being out there, somewhere in the sky. God is within us. God is the deepest part of ourselves, the part that is connected to everything else. And if we can find that part of ourselves, if we can live from that place, then we will know true peace and true joy. Iris has never been particularly religious, but she finds herself moved by the man’s words. She feels a sense of longing, a sense that there is something more to life than what she has experienced so far. On the sixth day, the man talks about the secret. “The secret,” he says, “is that there is no secret. There is no magic formula, no hidden knowledge that will solve all your problems. The secret is simply to live your life with awareness, with compassion, with love. The secret is to be present in each moment, to appreciate the beauty of the world, to connect with other people. The secret is to be yourself.” Iris is disappointed. She had been hoping for something more dramatic, something more transformative. But as she thinks about what the man has said, she realizes that he is right. There is no secret. There is only life, with all its joys and sorrows, its challenges and its opportunities. And it is up to her to make the most of it. On the seventh day, Iris goes back to The Secret for the last time. She thanks the man for his wisdom. He smiles and says, “You are welcome. But remember, the real work begins now. You have to go out into the world and live what you have learned.” Iris leaves The Secret and walks out into the street. The world looks different to her now. She sees the beauty in the ordinary things: in the sunlight filtering through the leaves, in the smile of a child, in the sound of laughter. She feels a sense of gratitude for her life, for her husband, for her friends. She goes home and tells her husband about her experience. He is skeptical at first, but he listens patiently. And as she talks, he begins to see a change in her. She seems more alive, more present. He finds himself drawn to her in a new way. In the weeks and months that follow, Iris and her husband begin to rediscover each other. They talk more openly and honestly. They spend more time together. They make love with a new passion. They find that their love has deepened, that it has become more real. Iris also begins to make changes in her own life. She quits her job and starts her own busi ness. She volunteers at a local homeless shelter. She takes up painting. She finds that she is happier and more fulfilled than she has ever been before. One day, Iris is walking down the street, and she sees the sign for The Secret. She stops and looks at it, and she smiles. She knows that she will never forget what she learned there. And she knows that the secret is not something that can be given or taken away. The secret is something that each of us must find for ourselves. # 2 he story of Iris is a fable for our times. It is a story about the search for meaning in a world that often seems meaningless. It is a story ## Tabout the desire for transformation, for a sec ond chance, for a new life. In our culture, we are constantly bombarded with messages that tell us that we need to be thinner, richer, more successful, more beautiful. We are told that happiness is just around the corner, if only we buy the right product, take the right pill, or find the right partner. But the truth is that there is no magic formula for happiness. There is no secret that will solve all our problems. The secret is simply to live our lives with awareness, with compassion, with love. The secret is to be present in each moment, to appreciate the beauty of the world, to connect with other people. The secret is to be ourselves. This is not always easy. It requires courage to face up to who we really are, to accept our flaws and our limitations. It requires courage to let go of our illusions, to give up our need for control. It requires courage to open our hearts to love, even though we know that love can be painful. But if we can find the courage to live authentically, if we can find the courage to be ourselves, then we will find a happiness that is deep and lasting. We will find a happiness that is not dependent on external circumstances, but that comes from within. The secret is not a destination. It is a journey. It is a journey of self-discovery, a journey of growth, a journey of love. And it is a journey that we must all take, if 2017 in the world **Eva Hoffmann** is the author of *Lost in Translation, Exit into History* and *Shtetl*, and was the recipient of a Guggenheim Fellowship in 1998. She lives in London. Also by Eva Hoffman Lost in Translation Exit into History Copyright © 1998 by Eva Hoffman All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. Published in the United States by PublicAffairs™, a member of the Perseus Books Group. No part of this book may be reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews. For information, address PublicAffairs, 250 West 57th Street, Suite 1321, New York, NY 10107. Book design by Jenny Dossin. Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Hoffman, Eva, 1945– The secret: a fable for our times / Eva Hoffman.—1st ed. p. cm. ISBN 1-891620-06-2 1. Man-woman relationships—United States—Fiction. 2. Psychotherapist and patient—Fiction. I. Title. PS3558.O3465543 1998 813’.54—dc21 98-26445 CIP FIRST EDITION 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 # 1 The story begins, like many other stories, with a man and a woman. They are an attractive couple, and to look at them in the street or at a party, you would think that they are happy. They are not unhappy, exactly, but they have been married for several years now, and the first flush of excitement has faded. Their love has grown comfortable and companionable. They are used to each other, and sometimes they are bored. Now Iris, the woman, is thirty-two, and she has begun to feel a certain impatience, a certain yearning. She feels that her life is too placid, too predictable; she wants something new, something to happen to her. She isn’t quite sure what she wants, but perhaps it is something like a second chance, or a second life. She has a vague sense that somewhere, out there, there is a door that will open onto an entirely different world, a world of richness, of intensity, of significance. If only she could find that door. If only she could turn the magic key. One day, she is walking down the street, and she sees a sign above a doorway. The sign says, simply, The Secret. She stops, and looks at it, and is intrigued. She has always liked secrets. They are private and intimate: they create a special bond between the person who tells and the person who is told. She has always thought that a secret is a kind of gift, a gift of trust. So she walks up the steps and opens the door. Inside, she finds a small, dimly lit room. There are a few chairs and a desk, and behind the desk sits a man. He is middle-aged, with a kind face and gentle eyes. He looks at her and smiles. “Can I help you?” he asks. “I’m not sure,” Iris says. “I saw your sign. What is The Secret?” The man leans forward. “The Secret,” he says, “is that there is no secret. But if you want to know more, you will have to come back. You will have to come back every day for a week. And each day, I will tell you a little more.” Iris is intrigued. She agrees to come back. The next day, she returns. The man is waiting for her. He asks her to sit down, and he begins to talk. He talks about the nature of reality, about the illusions we live by, about the masks we wear. He talks about the need for authenticity, for honesty, for truth. He talks about the importance of facing up to who we really are. Iris listens, fascinated. She has never heard anyone talk like this before. She feels as if she is being given a glimpse into a hidden world, a world of deeper meanings and greater possibilities. She feels as if she is being awakened from a long sleep. On the third day, the man talks about love. He says that most people do not know how to love. They confuse love with possession, with need, with dependency. They use love as a way of avoiding themselves. But real love, he saysishita, 2008. the other, the secret, a fable for our times, eva hoffman, publicaffairs. isbn 1-891620-06-2. 1. man-woman ... Eva Hoffmann is the author of Lost in Translation, Exit into History and Shtetl, and was the recipient of a Guggenheim Fellowship in 1998. She lives in London. Also by Eva Hoffman Lost in Translation Exit into History Copyright © 1998 by Eva Hoffman All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. Published in the United States by PublicAffairs™, a member of the Perseus Books Group. No part of this book may be reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews. For information, address PublicAffairs, 250 West 57th Street, Suite 1321, New York, NY 10107. Book design by Jenny Dossin. Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Hoffman, Eva, 1945– The secret: a fable for our times / Eva Hoffman.—1st ed. p. cm. ISBN 1-891620-06-2 1. Man-woman relationships—United States—Fiction. 2. Psychotherapist and patient—Fiction. I. Title. PS3558.O3465543 1998 813’.54—dc21 98-26445 CIP FIRST EDITION 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 # 1 The story begins, like many other stories, with a man and a woman. They are an attractive couple, and to look at them in the street or at a party, you would think that they are happy. They are not unhappy, exactly, but they have been married for several years now, and the first flush of excitement has faded. Their love has grown comfortable and companionable. They are used to each other, and sometimes they are bored. Now Iris, the woman, is thirty-two, and she has begun to feel a certain impatience, a certain yearning. She feels that her life is too placid, too predictable; she wants something new, something to happen to her. She isn’t quite sure what she wants, but perhaps it is something like a second chance, or a second life. She has a vague sense that somewhere, out there, there is a door that will open onto an entirely different world, a world of richness, of intensity, of significance. If only she could find that door. If only she could turn the magic key. One day, she is walking down the street, and she sees a sign above a doorway. The sign says, simply, The Secret. She stops, and looks at it, and is intrigued. She has always liked secrets. They are private and intimate: they create a special bond between the person who tells and the person who is told. She has always thought that a secret is a kind of gift, a gift of trust. So she walks up the steps and opens the door. Inside, she finds a small, dimly lit room. There are a few chairs and a desk, and behind the desk sits a man. He is middle-aged, with a kind face and gentle eyes. He looks at her and smiles. “Can I help you?” he asks. “I’m not sure,” Iris says. “I saw your sign. What is The Secret?” The man leans forward. “The Secret,” he says, “is that there is no secret. But if you want to know more, you will have to come back. You will have to come back every day for a week. And each day, I will tell you a little more.” Iris is intrigued. She agrees to come back. The next day, she returns. The man is waiting for her. He asks her to sit down, and he begins to talk. He talks about the nature of reality, about the illusions we live by, about the masks we wear. He talks about the need for authenticity, for honesty, for truth. He talks about the importance of facing up to who we really are. Iris listens, fascinated. She has never heard anyone talk like this before. She feels as if she is being given a glimpse into a hidden world, a world of deeper meanings and greater possibilities. She feels as if she is being awakened from a long sleep. On the third day, the man talks about love. He says that most people do not know how to love. They confuse love with possession, with need, with dependency. They use love as a way of avoiding themselves. But real love, he says, is a meeting of two souls. It is a recognition of the other person’s essential being. It is a gift of freedom. Iris thinks about her own marriage. She loves her husband, but she has to admit that their love has become routine. They have settled into a pattern, and they no longer really see each other. They take each other for granted. She wonders if there is a way to recover the intensity they once had. On the fourth day, the man talks about death. He says that most people are afraid of death, and so they avoid thinking about it. But death is a part of life, he says. It is the great mystery. And if we can face up to death, if we can accept it, then we can live more fully. We can appreciate the preciousness of each moment. Iris thinks about her own mortality. She is still young, but she knows that she will not live forever. She wonders what she wants to do with her life. She wonders what legacy she will leave behind. On the fifth day, the man talks about God. He says that God is not a being out there, somewhere in the sky. God is within us. God is the deepest part of ourselves, the part that is connected to everything else. And if we can find that part of ourselves, if we can live from that place, then we will know true peace and true joy. Iris has never been particularly religious, but she finds herself moved by the man’s words. She feels a sense of longing, a sense that there is something more to life than what she has experienced so far. On the sixth day, the man talks about the secret. “The secret,” he says, “is that there is no secret. There is no magic formula, no hidden knowledge that will solve all your problems. The secret is simply to live your life with awareness, with compassion, with love. The secret is to be present in each moment, to appreciate the beauty of the world, to connect with other people. The secret is to be yourself.” Iris is disappointed. She had been hoping for something more dramatic, something more transformative. But as she thinks about what the man has said, she realizes that he is right. There is no secret. There is only life, with all its joys and sorrows, its challenges and its opportunities. And it is up to her to make the most of it. On the seventh day, Iris goes back to The Secret for the last time. She thanks the man for his wisdom. He smiles and says, “You are welcome. But remember, the real work begins now. You have to go out into the world and live what you have learned.” Iris leaves The Secret and walks out into the street. The world looks different to her now. She sees the beauty in the ordinary things: in the sunlight filtering through the leaves, in the smile of a child, in the sound of laughter. She feels a sense of gratitude for her life, for her husband, for her friends. She goes home and tells her husband about her experience. He is skeptical at first, but he listens patiently. And as she talks, he begins to see a change in her. She seems more alive, more present. He finds himself drawn to her in a new way. In the weeks and months that follow, Iris and her husband begin to rediscover each other. They talk more openly and honestly. They spend more time together. They make love with a new passion. They find that their love has deepened, that it has become more real. Iris also begins to make changes in her own life. She quits her job and starts her own business. She volunteers at a local homeless shelter. She takes up painting. She finds that she is happier and more fulfilled than she has ever been before. One day, Iris is walking down the street, and she sees the sign for The Secret. **Eva Hoffmann** is the author of *Lost in Translation, Exit into History* and *Shtetl*, and was the recipient of a Guggenheim Fellowship in 1998. She lives in London. Also by Eva Hoffman Lost in Translation Exit into History Copyright © 1998 by Eva Hoffman All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. Published in the United States by PublicAffairs™, a member of the Perseus Books Group. No part of this book may be reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews. For information, address PublicAffairs, 250 West 57th Street, Suite 1321, New York, NY 10107. Book design by Jenny Dossin. Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Hoffman, Eva, 1945– The secret: a fable for our times / Eva Hoffman.—1st ed. p. cm. ISBN 1-891620-06-2 1. Man-woman relationships—United States—Fiction. 2. Psychotherapist and patient—Fiction. I. Title. PS3558.O3465543 1998 813’.54—dc21 98-26445 CIP FIRST EDITION 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 # 1 The story begins, like many other stories, with a man and a woman. They are an attractive couple, and to look at them in the street or at a party, you would think that they are happy. They are not unhappy, exactly, but they have been married for several years now, and the first flush of excitement has faded. Their love has grown comfortable and companionable. They are **Eva Hoffmann** is the author of *Lost in Translation, Exit into History* and *Shtetl*, and was the recipient of a Guggenheim Fellowship in 1998. She lives in London. Also by Eva Hoffman Lost in Translation Exit into History Copyright © 1998 by Eva Hoffman All rights reserved under International and Pan-American Copyright Conventions. Published in the United States by PublicAffairs™, a member of the Perseus Books Group. No part of this book may be reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews. For information, address PublicAffairs, 250 West 57th Street, Suite 1321, New York, NY 10107. Book design by Jenny Dossin. Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data Hoffman, Eva, 1945– The secret: a fable for our times / Eva Hoffman.—1st ed. p. cm. ISBN 1-891620-06-2 1. Man-woman relationships—United States—Fiction. 2. Psychotherapist and patient—Fiction. I. Title. PS3558.O3465543 1998 813’.54—dc21 98-26445 CIP FIRST EDITION 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 # 1 The story begins, like many other stories, with a man and a woman. They are an attractive couple, and to look at them in the street or at a party, you would think that they are happy. They are not unhappy, exactly, but they have been married for several years now, and the first flush of excitement has faded. Their love has grown comfortable and companionable. They are used to each other, and sometimes they are bored. Now Iris, the woman, is thirty-two, and she has begun to feel a certain impatience, a certain yearning. She feels that her life is too placid, too predictable; she wants something new, something to happen to her. She isn’t quite sure what she wants, but perhaps it is something like a second chance, or a second life. She has a vague sense that somewhere, out there, there is a door that will open onto an entirely different world, a world of richness, of intensity, of significance. If only she could find that door. If only she could turn the magic key. One day, she is walking down the street, and she sees a sign above a doorway. The sign says, simply, The Secret. She stops, and looks at it, and is intrigued. She has always liked secrets. They are private and intimate: they create a special bond between the person who tells and the person who is told. She has always thought that a secret is a kind of gift, a gift of trust. So she walks up the steps and opens the door. Inside, she finds a small, dimly lit room. There are a few chairs and a desk, and behind the desk sits a man. He is middle-aged, with a kind face and gentle eyes. He looks at her and smiles. “Can I help you?” he asks. “I’m not sure,” Iris says. “I saw your sign. What is The Secret?” The man leans forward. “The Secret,” he says, “is that there is no secret. But if you want to know more, you will have to come back. You will have to come back every day for a week. And each day, I will tell you a little more.” Iris is intrigued. She agrees to come back. The next day, she returns. The man is waiting for her. He asks her to sit down, and he begins to talk. He talks about the nature of reality, about the illusions we live by, about the masks we wear. He talks about the need for authenticity, for honesty, for truth. He talks about the importance of facing up to who we really are. Iris listens, fascinated. She has never heard anyone talk like this before. She feels as if she is being given a glimpse into a hidden world, a world of deeper meanings and greater possibilities. She feels as if she is being awakened from a long sleep. On the third day, the man talks about love. He says that most people do not know how to love. They confuse love with possession, with need, with dependency. They use love as a way of avoiding themselves. But real love, he says, is a meeting of two souls. It is a recognition of the other person’s essential being. It is a gift of freedom. Iris thinks about her own marriage. She loves her husband, but she has to admit that their love has become routine. They have settled into a pattern, and they no longer really see each other. They take each other for granted. She wonders if there is a way to recover the intensity they once had. On the fourth day, the man talks about death. He says that most people are afraid of death, and so they avoid thinking about it. But death is a part of life, he says. It is the great mystery. And if we can face up to death, if we can accept it, then we can live more fully. We can appreciate the preciousness of each moment. Iris thinks about her own mortality. She is still young, but she knows that she will not live forever. She wonders what she wants to do with her life. She wonders what legacy she will leave behind. On the fifth day, the man talks about God. He says that God is not a being out there, somewhere in the sky. God is within us. God is the deepest part of ourselves, the part that is connected to everything else. And if we can find that part of ourselves, if we can live from that place, then we will know true peace